love bites.

I have several dilemas right now, ladies and gentlemen.

1) The boy that I've been allllllll about the last couple weeks has a girlfriend. This information came to light during our writing session (me, him, and his siblings) on Tuesday. Normally I'd be completely crushed, which, part of me sort of is. However, in talking to him and hearing him and his brother banter back and forth, he apparently doesn't even really like this girlfriend anymore. She's out of state, they've been on and off for over a year. And we all know how that "on and off" shit works...it usually equals "off" in the end. He says he "doesnt know, doesn't think" he loves her. Which the brother and I responded with a resounding, "Then, that's a No, dude." However, she's moving here in 3 weeks, against his wishes. They actually broke up a little while ago b/c he told her he was in no position to have her move here for him. Which she responded with, "I'm not moving there for you. I want out of Arizona." Lies, all lies. If a boy ever told me he didn't want me to move to be with him, I might take that as a sign. A BIG sign...

2) His brother is hilarious. I actually liked him first when I first met the two of them over a month ago. His brother is short, muscular, dirty blonde hair and facial hair, sooooo my type. ;) But then the younger brother started talking to me and I started to like him...but during our writing session, the older brother and I hit it off pretty well too. I saw both of them last night at my writer's show. Ugh...they're both SO hot. This is just a whirlwind of confusion right now.

3) Nick's best friend that's been living in Texas for over 6 months calls me/texts me every now and then. Which I don't mind, b/c he's a really cool guy and has always been nothing but great to me. And when I found out about all of Nick's "douche-baggery", Phil was the first one I called and bawled my eyes out to. So we've kept somewhat of a 'friendship' going since that dreadful month of February. Well...Phil is currently texting me this morning telling me he's in Tennessee and wants to see me. Which, I agreed to waaayyyy back in the day b/c I wasn't thinking clearly and basically, wanted to piss Nick off. But now? Now I'm positive I never want ANYTHING to do with him or anyone associated with him. Even the innocent bystanders that are still my friends on Facebook or MySpace. B/c everytime I see a status change or whatever, it pisses me off. And I don't need that in my life right now. Or ever. Honestly, I'd like to go on and act as though Nick never existed...never was in my world at any given time, therefore, never hurt me as deeply as he did. I know that's unrealistic. I know that after almost 4 months, I should be over it. But I don't really know how you get over something like that completely. Not unless you have this AMAZING guy in your life that just makes you forget all the assholes you dated before. And unfortunately, this AMAZING guy has yet to make an appearance in my life thus far...

4) Jake stood me up on Friday night. Never apologized. Then ignored my texts the entire weekend and my phone call on Monday. Which left me feeling retarded, pathetic, and just downright desperate. Which, I am NONE of these things. I'm just bored. And not only that, but it was just common knowledge that him and I were never going anywhere, it was just to pass the time. It was common knowledge that I'd be the one to break things off b/c 1)I'm out of his league. 2)My friends all hate him. 3)He's friends with Cory. 4)He parties too much.
So to be completely ignored for 5 days is just ridiculous on all accounts. Well, he finally called and left me a voicemail yesterday that went something like this...

"Hey, it's Jake. Sorry I haven't been around lately. I've not really been talking or out with anyone really. I had some job interviews that didn't go too well so I've just been out of it. Sorry I haven't called, I just haven't been in a good mood for anyone. Just in a funk. Call me when you get this."

Seriously? Seriously.

After 5 drinks last night (yes, 5...all during my writer's night)....I texted him.
Me: I'm under the impression we're no longer speaking.
Him: I know, I'm sorry. That's my fault.
Me: I highly doubt you're sorry. And the only reason I'm texting you right now is because I've been drinking.
Him: Right. Well have a good night then. Call me if you ever wanna talk sometime.
Me: Ugh. I don't even know how to respond to that. All I know is that I DON'T deal with being ignored. Ignored entirely.

End of conversation.


Throughout the duration of typing this blog, I just agreed to meet Phil and his friend at Opry Mills. I'm retarded. And extremely not ok with this decision but b/c I'm good at making bad decisions lately...I'm going.