Not at all possible.

It is not at all possible for me to try to recap the last 6 and 1/2 months for you, so I will refrain from trying. However, I will say that I am in a much better place than the last blog I posted back in September. I did exactly what I said I was going to do. I weeded out those people that were unnecessarily causing turmoil in my life. I've redefined my relationships and friendship with people and accept them for what they are. I've realized that just because you want something to work, doesn't mean the other person does. And when that happens, it's time to let it be and move on. I've changed A LOT...I've loosened my grip and become a lot less dependant on people that I thought I could never be without. I learned how to stop being loyal to those that really don't care. And it's good.

Ellie is a fabulous roommate and the thought of her going back to London in September brings me great sadness. The first 6 months have been amazing, a complete turn around from the situation I was in before. I look forward to another 6 months with my lil brit.

Nick and I are good. Really good, actually. I always hated it when I'd see girls talk like they could change a guy, when they'd make excuses for him. I always stood firm that no one should ever want someone, thinking they will be the one to change him. I went through Ryan. I went through Nick Part 1 & 2, and my reasoning turned out correct both times. But this...this seems to be the expection. The exception that I never saw coming. I think I always KNEW the potential in him. I'd see little glimpses here and there of how absolutely incredible he coul be and how happy he could make me. But then, just like that, they'd go away and I'd be left waiting for another tease. But this time, there is no tease. No one really seems to believe it, especially my family. But Ellie & my managers see the transformation. I certainly see the complete 180 each and every day. He's a different person and to be honest with you, sometimes it freaks me out. I'm used to the struggle...I'm not used to carefree, easy, pure and utter happiness, committment, constant reassurance. It's like another world.

I'm excited for 2009. I'm excited to release my new EP this summer. For CMA Fest. For the possibilities that lie with touring overseas and doing an album with Cracker Barrel. I'm excited to be happy and in love for the first time in God knows how long. To travel. To meet new people. To make this life everything I knew it could be.